I'm Paula Powersurge, and we're here today with KJ Miller to get a closer look at her journey through Menopause or what she refers to as "Mental Pause."
WHILE ASSURING THE LADIES THAT MENOPAUSE IS MANAGEABLE, KJ BEGINS TO PERSPIRE PROFUSELY AND LEAPS FROM THE TABLE YODELING AND DOING A GERMANIC DANCE.
Paula: So, KJ, I hear you're singing the praises of "mental pause."
KJ: It's very perspiring, I mean inspiring...
Paula: Would you mind sharing with us?
KJ: Well, I've renamed my children hundreds of times. And, I took my son to school once and forgot to drop him off.
Paula: That must have been a shock.
KJ: Not as shocking as hearing his voice from the backseat when I pulled into my driveway!
Paula: That would be startling... Anything else?
KJ: You know all those mysterious gorilla hairs on my body?
Paula: Uh, actually, I don't.
KJ: Well, I can now track their previous addresses.
Paula: How's that?
Paula: I didn't think Mapquest was that interactive.
KJ: Mapquest is uncharted territory.
Paula: Maps are uncharted?
KJ: I mean, you know, they do more than you think. The other day, I misplaced my reading glasses for the...um...for the... I don't remember how many times, but Mapquest helped me find them!
Paula: Are you serious?
KJ: Oh, yes! I just typed in my address.
Paula: Didn't that give you a map of where you live?
KJ: It did...and that's where I found my glasses!!!
Paula: Amazing... Is there anything else noteworthy?
KJ: Yes there is! We've been having heat spells in California. This combined with hot flashes...well, I'm toast! I had to turn on the air conditioner.
Paula: Wow, that's pretty hot for spring!
KJ: At least the air conditioning made me feel, well, normal.
Paula: Did you notice anything peculiar?
KJ: My daughter served me lunch wearing winter woolens.
KJ: Oh, and then I find myself standing in front of my kitchen pantry a lot.
Paula: Has your appetite increased?
KJ: No, I just stand there trying to figure out why I'm standing there. Then, finally, it comes to me. I exclaim, "Aha, I need my hair brush!" So off I go to the bathroom. Then, I'll stand in front of my pantry again: "I need to get socks out of the dryer!" And, away I go.
Paula: How many times do you do this?
KJ: [Concentrating.] I don't remember.
Paula: Do you find yourself at the pantry several times a day?
KJ: I honestly don't remember. [Becomes uncomfortable.]
Paula: Surely, you have some idea.
KJ: I'm not sure... [Begins to perspire.]
Paula: Do you need to...
KJ: Yes, I'll be going to my pantry now...